Kuma`s 2nd Death Day

Today is two years since Kuma was killed by Cheryl (her mother) and the vet at the hospital. I relive this day in horrible regret and darkness. Why, because Kuma should still be alive today.

I relive the moment Kuma died and the two days leading up to it. It didn`t have to happen that way. They tried 3 times to kill her. Kuma was running with her paws in the air, She was in a seizure because Cheryl told them to kill her and all her anti-seizure medication was stopped 12 hours earlier. My regret is letting it happen. Even though I asked them to give her another day, they refused because they said that Cheryl was the owner and I didn`t fight it strong enough.

Death is final. For me there is no going back. There is only reliving my weakness at the time and carrying this betrayal of my best friend for the rest of my life. It all turns into anger. Anger at myself first and anger at the senseless people who caused this. Anger at the stupidity, the knee-jerk thinking and the absolute selfish stingyness.

Obviously I am still angry and increasingly so. A beautiful, gentle, loving life destroyed senslessly, for no reason other than to save some money.