99 Wrong Turns
Kuma had a very strong life force. She fought hard to live through all the wrong decsions that made her life harder and not easier. She overcame every obstacle thrown at her except the last one, her mother cutting off her meds and telling the vet to kill her.
Looking back, I see all the wrong turns, all the wrong decisions I made that lead to her too early daath.
The biggest mistake I made was always respecting that Kuma was Cheryl's dog and never calling her my own. Well, Cheryl abondoned Kuma 4 years ago. She left her and never asked about her. In Kuma's last two years of life, Cheryl didn't even know if Kuma was still alive. She didn't care enough to even ask.
Why is this important? Because when I checked Kuma into the emergency hostpital, they called up Kuma's file from 2004 which had Cheryl as the owner and asked if I wanted to change that to show me as the owner. Out of stupid respect I said to not change it an continue to show Cheryl as the owner. This was the absolute biggest mistake I made that got Kuma killed.
If I had listed myself as Kuma's owner the vets would not have called Cheryl. They would not have convinced Cheryl to stop Kuma's medications and basically leave her for dead like a piece of garbage until I came in. Because Cheryl was the owner, they did not listen to me when I asked to give Kuma another day to wake up from her induced coma. They would not have answered my request with "Cheryl is the owner and Cheryl closed out the account and said to put her down".
If Cheryl was not listed as Kuma's owner, the vets would have listened to me and let Kuma wake up. Kuma could still have been alive today.
But, there are many, many bad decisions that were made along the way that caused Kuma to be killed early. I will work my way backwards from when Kuma was killed to every wrong turn that led her to this horrible point.
99. After trying 2 times to kill Kuma and failing, I should have seen this as a sign to stop the vet and not let him try a third time. I had plenty of time, after the first failed attempt he called in two girls to shave Kuma's other paw and set up a cathetor. After the second one failed and he said that the sedative was not working and he had to go bad and reload for a third attempt, I made the wrong decision to continue trying to kill Kuma. If I believed in signs, thery were all there. I asked Kuma for a sign and she was giving them to me. I ignored them and continued. I regret this moment, this fatally wrong decision and I relive it over and over again condeming myself for making it. Why could I have not had the presence of mind to do the right thing and stop this execution of my best friend?
98 On the last day when I walked in, I saw that Kuma's charts were missing. I saw that Kuma's cathetor had been removed and the glass doors were closed. I did not know that the decision was made to kill Kuma and the vet didn't tell me that she stoppped her medication which would cause her to go into seizures. I made a wrong decision to not ask to see Kuma's charts. I would have seen when her medications were stopped. I did not ask why her doors were closed and her cathetor removed. I sensed they were not taking care of her but did not confront them on it. I let it go.