Why I Loved Kuma So Much
I should say why I love Kuma instead of loved because I will always love Kuma.
We love someone usually because they love us. Kuma loved me. How do I know? I will explain but first let's start with Kuma's character and personality.
Kuma was born playful and mischievous. One thing that was different about her from the start was she was always in a good mood. She was never grumpy or angry. even as a pup, she observed you and your mood and she would try to entice you to play. She would draw you in by pretending to ignore you then she would turn around and snap at your nose. This was her first game she played. Later she would walk toward you then like a hockey player change direction, deak you out and pass you then look back at you laughingly saying "come try to catch me". She played the "I'm not looking at you" game many ways but her favorite was "go ahead try to touch my paws" and she would always be faster than you.
Kuma had more energy as a pup than any other dog I knew and this was always playful energy. She was brought up very positively and was never scolded in her life. Kuma did not know what anger was. She was never repremanded, she was never cage trained or restrained or tied up to anything. Kuma was always a free spirit playful little girl. She only knew love and affection. She got lots of it and gave lots back as well.
Kuma had a lot of one on one time spent with her. Over the years, she started to trade some of her animal instincts of fear and self protection with absolute trust and affection with a human being. She was very social with people and loved to be in a group of people and she did not care to be with other dogs. Her favorite time was sleeping under a table in a room full of people talking.
Kuma was born intelligent and curious. She always needed mental stimulation and loved going to new places. Her favorite by far was going mountain biking and running the trails ahead of us. she had an incredible sense of where the trail was and loved to follow it, stopping up ahead and looking back to say, "common catch up". I would say that when she was young, this was her greatest pleasure, running down trails in the woods and running back to find us. Kuma ran down trails in Florida, and in Quebec in the Laurentian mountains and near Montreal. Even up to her last days, in her senile confusion she walked around the gym and peered between the machines and under the desk looking for trails to follow.
The most shocking and amazing feat I saw Kuma do was when we were mountan biking in Rigau Quebec. It was on a path that went through private property and the owner cut a large tree down to fall directly over the path to stop bikers from proceding. Kuma fallowed the trail and came to this path. We came up behind her and she stopped to survey the situation. She looked around then decided to go through it. She jumped straight up in the air and come down just a foot ahead between some branches, then immediately jumped back up and then down ahead between the next branches. She jumped up and down like this about 5 times picking her path exactly and jumping about 4 feet in the air straight up and down each time. She got to the other side and immediately looked back like it was nothing and wondering why we were still standing thiere with our bikes. We could not do what she did, we had to take the long way around carrying our bikes around the tree in the woods.
Kuma also loved the snow in winter and she loved to climb snow banks. She was always determined to get to the top then look around like she was the king of the castle, proud in her achievement.
This playful, sensitive human-like behavior was what Kuma was born with and developed into her later years.
As she got older and I spent more time with her, Kuma became more human like, more caring and more sensitive and still playful. She also became more intelligent and understanding. In her older age, Kuma became more emotional and more loving and affectionate.
Kuma's greatest pleasure in her later years was just to be with me. It was more than a dependence on me for food and assistance, it became an emotional need to see me and be near me. Kuma would actually cry tears streaming down her face when I was not there. When I came back after being away for a short while, I had to wipe both sides of her face that wear just wet from her tears.
Kuma was an emotional being. She loved people and she was very happy to see people that she hadn't seen for a while even up to 6 months ago. She was very attached to her mother and for the first half of her life her mother came first. Kuma also developed a special relationship with her younger sister Abbie. Abbie was the only person that Kuma would stay and sleep with when I had to go out of town.
Later she was loved and cared for by Marie and her little brother Mac which she just loved to watch run around. Kuma also had a 10 year relationship with Prince the cat. Her game with him was to quietly walk up to him and try to sniff him. She always let him know who was boss even as she got older.
In her last three years, it made me sad and angry knowing how much Kuma loved people, that she never saw these people again and spent the last three years alone.
What Kuma meant to Me
Kuma stayed when everyone else left and never came back. Kuma carried me through all the bad times, loneliness, loss and heartbreak that I suffered. She was always there. She healed herself from coming close to death several times not just for me but because she wanted to be with me. She did not want to leave. She enjoyed her life and her routine. Kuma kept me going.
Kuma let me take care of her and serve her. This was our relationship. I cooked meals for her that I would not have cooked for myself. I got up out of bed whenever she needed to get up. I went outside and took her places. Taking care of Kuma gave me a purpose in life, a reason for being when I didn't have any other reasons. She carried me through times when I just didn't want to continue anymore but knew that I had to because no one else would take care of her.
Kuma felt me. We had a relationship beyond understanding. Once after Kuma had just had a seizure, I just couldn't take seeing her like that and I started crying out loud. Kuma was just in the middle of heavy breathing right after her seizure and she stopped and listened and tried to look at me. I stopped crying immediately and then she went back and continued her gasping for air. I thought this was a coincidence and a minute later, I let myself cry again. Again, she stopped her heavy breathing and crying and listened to see if something was wrong with me. How do I explain this when Kuma was completely deaf and yet she felt my feelings and became concerned for me in the middle of her own crisis.